RISE Resources
Counseling and Psychotherapy for Children, Teens and their Families
RISE Resources
Counseling and Psychotherapy Resources for Children, Teens and their Families
How Do You Like Them Apples?
Understanding Trauma
The objective for today’s blog entry is to better understand trauma using the analogy of an apple.
The purpose of this correlation is to show that trauma may appear one way on the outside but may be very different on the inside.
Most people have come into contact with apples in some form: hanging on a tree branch, resting in a crate at the market, or sitting on the teacher’s desk.
Some apples are pleasing to the eye, especially when they are perfectly round, shiny, and vibrant in color. However, an apple may seem appealing on the outside, but look, feel, and taste unpleasant on the inside. For example, it may be brown, mealy, and bitter tasting under the surface.
Similarly, individuals impacted by trauma can look healthy, strong, and happy on the surface, while experiencing disturbing thoughts, emotional distress, and other struggles within. For example, a child may witness his father threaten to hurt his mother at home one night. Then, he may show up to school the next day with a smile on his face, earn an outstanding score on his test, and score the winning goal during gym class. Meanwhile, he may be terrified of the possibility that he will return home to find his mother severely injured (or worse). Similarly, he may be unable to sleep, be preoccupied with scanning his environment for possible threats, and be avoiding any interactions with his father.
In summary, if you see someone who seems “fine” or tells you he/she is “fine”, do not assume this is the case. Undetectable symptoms of trauma may be lurking underneath. Treat everyone you meet with respect, compassion, and care. Your interaction with a person may influence the outcome of his/her situation.
In addition, if you are suffering on the inside related to trauma, do not be afraid to show it or tell someone. Letting others support you is a sign of strength, rather than weakness. We are all imperfect people who need help at times.
Today’s discussion questions:
- What is an example of a time you met someone who seemed to be in excellent condition on the outside, but was struggling on the inside? How did you respond to this person? How would you have responded differently had you been aware of this person’s challenges?
- What is an example of a time you put on the appearance of being “fine” or told others you were “fine”, but were actually in distress? How did others treat you in this situation? How did others’ responses impact you?
- What gets in the way of you showing your inner pain to the outside world and reaching out for help? What is one thing you can do today to overcome this barrier to healing?
